I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
