i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Randomize
