Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize