there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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