You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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