lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize