at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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