Please, let me fuck your mom
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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