if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize