I'm sorry my penis didn't work
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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