Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
