When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
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Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
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First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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