May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize