I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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