i just google imaged poop.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
