So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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