i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
She told me I should be a condom model.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
