I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize