What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize