You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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