Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
