High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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