omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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