You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
