dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
