Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
operation have a gay friend backfired
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I think people are normalizing furries
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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