sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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