just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
50% drunk capacity currently
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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