Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
another moral hangover. fuck.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
