just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize