She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
