Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Randomize