Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
