she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
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Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
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My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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