I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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