am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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