you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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