turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
