Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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