I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
