Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize