I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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