wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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