I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
