Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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