I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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