I'm gonna have a badass scar
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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