So drunk, too bad you don't want this
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
