I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
