Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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