this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
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And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
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Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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