I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
